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Friday 6 February 2015

Mom, I'm Fine!



It is so difficult to comprehend these mutable adult minds, most of the times, unlike mine. My reactions are almost predictable given a situation, like I like to look out from my school bus window, period. I cry when I am angry. I hit and push Brownie when she tries to take my toy away or eat my chocolate.

But my mom reacts differently to the same situations, making her so unpredictable. When I come back from school, she usually carries my bag for me and asks me what I did in school and if I finished my snack box or not. But yesterday, she hugged me tight, kissed me on the forehead and checked me from top to bottom. I would not change in the 3 hours I was away in school, now would I? But I loved it.

And instead of asking me what I did, she barged inside the bus and had a heated argument with the bus driver and the attendant. I could hear her say “Are you trying to punish my child for my act? Are you trying to teach me a lesson? Have you no mercy for a 4 year old?” She choked somewhere in the middle of the last sentence and came out of the bus. She held me in her arms tight and took me home while stroking my hair.

My dad also came right then, might be had a half day at office. He gave me a high-five and kept checking me out from a distance.

I got special attention the whole day later, Mom asked me what I wanted to eat and prepared me my favorite instant pasta without veggies. She kept telling me, “I am sorry sweetheart; you had to go through it”.

I was busy eating, but stopped briefly because I thought I heard someone sobbing. But, I continued gobbling in the fear of Brownie returning, my elder sister who comes later in the afternoon and has longer session in school.

I could hear mom talking to dad in a little weird tone, like the one I have when I cry a lot. “How traumatic it must have been, sitting alone in the bus, on unknown route. He must have waited for me looking around anxiously at the bus stop, but when no one came to pick him up he must have been heartbroken. When bus must have started, leaving behind his assigned stop, he would have wanted to call me out loudly. But I was not there”. Mom burst into tears.

“His pants were a little wet, because he could not have hold on for two long hours and didn’t have anywhere to go in a bus. But he looked ok otherwise.” Mom continued her explanation.

Dad interrupted, trying to stop mom from saying, “Its okay, don’t worry dear. Everything’s well that ends well”.

Mom came to check if I had finished eating and asked me I wanted a piece of cake. And brought me one without waiting for my reply and continued talking to dad.

“How could I do that? I have started taking things for granted at home and am busy with my own stuff. What if he had started crying, he would have been crying the whole 2 hours it took the bus to complete the route and drop him back. But I was only 2 minutes late to pick him up. I am usually always on time and if I am not, they are suppose to give a missed ring.”

Her emotions are something I am still learning to comprehend. Somewhere from being sorry and apologetic, she suddenly became angry. She was louder than, she usually is while scolding me. She was now saying, “Why can’t they give a call, and conveniently take the kid away. I was worried sick, when I called up school after 15-20 minutes of waiting in vain. They casually said he has been dropped. That pressed the panic button for me, I asked them to check again and they said they will get back to me within 15 minutes after confirming. That’s when I called you and asked you to go to school and check. They were the longest 15 minutes, my mind was processing all the negative possibilities there could have been. Oh God! Thank you for proving it all wrong.

Dad is usually silent, but this time around, he dared to interrupt mom to share his side of the story. He said, “When I reached the school, they were still trying to get in touch with the bus driver after you told them the bus route number. They talk about these camera installation and bus tracking systems, when they can’t even get their basics right. Its not acceptable, with so many nuisances we are hearing around.”

There was a time when both dad and mom were talking together. Its funny how each wants to tell his story first and they end up fighting like me and Brownie. Mom said, “When the school finally got in touch with the driver, they said  the driver took the kid with him and he is safe and finishing his snack box right now. He said he would drop the remaining kids and then on his way back to school he would drop the kid back to his apartment. Telling me in the most nonchalant way possible.”

“What a moment of relief that was, and put an end to those pessimistic thoughts we both we were going through but couldn’t share with each other.” Mom said and dad kept a hand on her shoulder.

I started feeling sleepy then and was throwing tantrums for her attention now. Mom was setting the table to sit down and eat.


They could not finish their conversation or lunch. As mom went to put me to bed, dad went to pick up Brownie at the bus stop. He didn’t want to be late.

Monday 26 January 2015

One and a half grand and a hair cut later!!

Its been long overdue, so I decided to go to a hair salon. I forgot to take an appointment, as its always last minute and dear receptionist asked to wait for just 5 minutes, and you know how long 5 minutes can take sometimes. While I was waiting, and reading some nonsense Fashion magazine from last year and hearing the person next to me cribbing about her MIL, another lady come up at the reception desk. I hadn’t even finished scanning her from top to bottom and wondering, what the hell she needs to get done, she looks like she is just out from a Salon, she whisked right in without waiting. Making me feel like, Why should I have to wait so much? Am I not paying for the service? Or should I get that damn membership that the reception lady always advises me to get? Sulking in the corner.


Anyways, after few five minutes later, the receptionist asked, who do you want to get styled with, Stylist, Senior Stylist, Style Director, or a Creative Director. If you want to go with the Junior Stylist, he will be with you right away, but since you didn’t book prior with Senior Stylist, you might have to wait. Yeah right, I know how busy he is sipping coffee and counting money.

I felt like I guinea pig choosing a Junior Stylist. What does that term mean beside a little lesser charges, anyways. Ok I understand he is less experienced, but it makes me feel cheap choosing that service and also he might just be a newbie, with no experience what so ever. There is no going back with haircuts, no warranties, no guarantees, no return policy.

I still chose the lowest priced service available holding my wallet tight and counting my blessings. So a trendy looking metrosexual guy with hair highlights walked up to me, introduced himself and asked me what I wanted. While he checked the volume, checked the texture, checked the length and checked the scalp, I was shivered nervously whether I passed his standards or not. What if I am denied a haircut today?

The red horned one, on one shoulder said, “Get a Perm done. It can’t get past unnoticed with I-could-care-less-husband of mine”

While the winged and harped one on the other shoulder spoke some sense, “Don’t do what you did last time. Just say that can be tied later and let him decide the rest. Don’t wake up your sleeping brains now.”

“Can you please get up and come to the hair wash area. We need to shampoo.” B..but..I …d…on’t …need…” He looks in horror at my bohemian style, unmanaged, unkept hair and I stood up silently and walked towards the wash area. I sniffed silently in my tissue at the humiliation.

We came back to the hair cut area and a man was getting groomed next to me. The kind that always fascinate me and inspire me to groom better. While I get my hair done, he is resting with his green facepack and cotton balls covering his eyes. I wish I could see his face and judge him.

He asked me the same question, I get asked every time I am in a Salon, in an attempt to engage me in small talks and showing off how caring he is about his customers. I don’t need small talks, please concentrate on my hair and that’s how I will know you care.

But as he showed me how much length he is going to cut, there should be a written contract with picture to support the claims. He cut as he wished and then showed me if its okay, like I can go back. Few minutes of serious blow-drying business later, he showed it to me again with a back mirror. I felt happy with my hair cut, as I always do the first day with half a bottle of each factory product in my hair, and as much time spent on my hair as much as I do the whole week in total.

I get back home and ask Mr Husband, “So?” He looks up from his laptop, takes a quick glance and says,”Nice. Have you found that bill I was telling you about anywhere?”



Thursday 22 January 2015

Battle of the Sexes.....No!!


I sometimes feel that Mr Husband and I don't live in the same house. Or maybe our eyes have been trained to see different set of things. Or our minds are wired differently. I know I maintain an exhaustive list, see below. But I really wonder how come he can see all this, when I can totally overlook it or choose to ignore it. Sometimes, when I have time, I wonder if it is all intentional or a master plan of the Architect. Not inspired by the Matrix :)

I bring a different perspective to the house. My eyesight is a little weak, better half says I need reading glasses, but that's his personal opinion. Which means I don’t see the dirt, or minute things. I look at the bigger picture, the brighter side, far sighted. No kidding.. 

If you are thinking if this post is a battle of the sexes or a Couple rivalry or another one of those Mars and Venus discussion. It is not, but this is a pre-anniversary gift (secretly reminding him of getting me a gift, hidden intentions you see). A celebration of how we complete each other. He brings details and I bring ……still figuring out. While you read on. 



Jan hit mein jaari - Anniversary is still far away, so you still have time to buy us the gift you forgot last time.

Wednesday 7 January 2015

My Travel Diary is a little Different

Exactly !! Should have taken a picture


I bumped my car again. Don’t worry I’m fine, hence the post. New Year, New Accidents, New Stories. In the last 4 years of my driving in the crazy Bangalore traffic, touch wood I have had no major hit and run case.

It was not entirely my fault this time though and FYI no one was hurt. Around 11am, I was returning home from my swimming lessons and I was just a turn away from home then. So that makes you very confident in known territory and also hurry up because you tend to suddenly remember the load of unwashed dishes lying all over the kitchen waiting for you. You know how one looks after a swim, nasty hair that look just like they have been electrocuted, tanning so bad that anyone can tell how your swim goggles are as they are imprinted deep into your skin. And body smelling like dead fish.

So there I was, waiting to take just the last turn for past 10 min. Can you believe so much traffic at that time of hour, is everyone jobless or they are all working the 11am shift? Oreo comes back from school at 11:45am and before that the love of my life, my bai is supposed to come. I need to get the chores finished, ok atleast my part of the chores finished by then. I was in a genuine hurry and cant afford to waste so much time. I decided to reverse a little, on the main road yes, and take left turn along the ramp that goes up to a restaurant.

What I didn’t realize, atleast that time, was that there is a step ahead, and not an inclined road. So as soon as I turned, the front wheels landed with a thud and the mud guard was making screeching sound as it was being torn apart and the back was in a different longitude and latitude. I stopped before the back wheel mud guard also came out. Oh God, it looked bad and there was no way I could get it out on my own.  While I was analyzing the damage done, the driver who was right across the street came out smiling and saying, I was waving at you to stop, but you just ignored. Now how was I suppose to understand the signal, I thought he was asking to pass before me, so ofcouse I increased my speed.

The driver, asked the madam sitting behind if he could offer help and if she could wait for 2 min. The madam sitting behind, looked at her watch, faked a smile towards me, and said drop me to office and you can help on your way back. Just as I expected. The driver said, I should call the towing company or the on-road assistance. Like I have the number on the back of my hand or understand how the stuff works. I have a husband to do such work.

So while I called Mr Husband, some 10-12 people gathered around the car. I don’t know if they were wondering if I was driving a stolen car from my rag look or were genuinely worried about my car and wanted to help. I surely didn’t look like a damsel in distress, so I doubted that anyone wanted to help.

Mr Husband said it would take him atleast 20 min to reach, so I should try taking the help of someone around. You see we have been married for more than a decade now, so situations like these are just a way to get back at each other.

A guy, passing by, in car, said try lifting the front wheels using a Jack. Well how am I supposed to know who Mr Jack is and where it is. But a guy from a neighborhood restaurant, whose entrance my car was blocking, offered to take out the jack and try lifting it. A couple of his staff and people on road, lifted the front wheels using the jack. I was too nervous to go back behind the wheels, so a scooter guy, who looked like his mom had just combed his hair, said he can. I was ok with whatever help I could get.

But the jack couldn’t hold on to the wheels as they tried to race and lift the whole body. So the idea was rejected by another fellow passerby, who later asked “How did you managed to get the car in this condition”. I tried not to beat him up by just saying “Good question.”

Meanwhile a group of people tried to lift the front of the car by hand, but it was badly stuck and was getting more scratched in the process. So that didn’t work out.

The manager of the same restaurant just drove in a mini truck, the ones they carry poultry hens and eggs in, had a better idea. He called all his staff and a few people around to lift the back of the car and move it out of the step without. It was easier because the car was on a slope and the guy behind the wheels was turning it in the opposite side.

And the car was out. I couldn’t be more thankful. The whole process took around 20-25 min, so just in time to pick up Oreo. I didn’t need Mr Husband, who I guess must have been helping some old lady cross the road or playing CandyCrush after stopping on side road. Now I wouldn’t have to do make the bed tea for him as a payback.

There was a lesson I learnt from the whole experience. People are more helpful than you think or they show in Bollywood movies. Not everyone has a meinu-ki-fark-penda-hai attitude. And the number of Road side assistance is available on a sticker right in the windscreen. 

HAPPY NEW YEAR !!